Something That I Want
by sparky753
Summary: Years after season 7, in NYC, Logan and Rory meet again. Although their impasse this time will only result in decisions that could change the rest of their lives as they take into account their dreams and hopes for their future.


**I've been obsessed with Gilmore Girls since it has been available to stream on Netflix! Now, I'm SO pumped about the revival that I've been obsessively checking the internet for more news. I cannot wait until the revival comes out so I decided to try my hand at writing again. Enjoy!**

It was a no strings attached agreement. _Again_. Back in college, they had begun their relationship as undefined as a comfort to both and now they had wound up at square one all over again.

Now at age 30, both having matured with time and their hearts healed with distance, they had agreed that a no strings attached agreement was best for the two of them.

Keeping her journalism future wide open after his proposal, she embarked as a reporter on Obama's campaign trail. Her articles on Obama were so charming and persuasive that she had multiple jobs offers from several big name newspapers, even one from the pressroom of the White house. Her dreams of becoming a foreign correspondent had started to come true.

After 6 months overseas reporting on the war-ravaged countries of the Middle East, she had enough of dirt and heartbreaking stories the countries could only offer. She missed her mom, stars hollow and its residents, even her grandparents. So she moved back and was offered a desk at the New York Post. The hustle and bustle of New York grew on her and soon it felt like home as she discovered the local coffee scene.

Their first encounter after the humiliating proposal was at her favorite coffee shop. He was running late to a meeting and desperately need an caffeine kick, so he had to settle for the small café. Logan had worked hard to make his start up company a success in California. However, when Mitchum came around demanding he return to the family business and stop fooling, he complied with conditions. They had merged the two companies and at age thirty, Logan had taken over as CEO.

In his rush, he had run straight into her. They were both stunned for moment before Logan offered to pick her dry cleaning bill.

She became infuriated and confronted him in his office after he sent a blank check to her desk. She told him that she did not need anything from him and in the heat of her passionate tirade, their lust for each other won over and they fucked on his desk. After that, they had agreed to a no strings situation to spare themselves the heartache of opening up past wounds

And for the last two years, they had shared an apartment. They came home every night to each other. Despite the no strings agreement, she knew Logan was not seeing anyone else like he had during their first agreement and she wasn't either. She enjoyed how relaxed their relationship was. Without it being serious, they did not have outside pressure, especially from their families.

She had told Lorelai she was see someone that wasn't serious and when ever they found themselves talking about her love life, Rory quickly steered the conversation to work and the on goings of her beloved hometown of Stars Hollow.

She could say she was unequivocally happy with her life right now until she found the ring at the bottom of his sock drawer.

She was helping him pack for their well deserved vacation to Tahiti while he was at the office when she stumbled across small black box. The ring inside was not the same one he had promised forever to her 8 years ago. It was a bigger diamond with much more gaudier setting.

She could feel herself hyperventilating at the thought of marriage. Things were going so well between them and she hated the heartbreak it would cause them when she said no again. She was not ready to settle down and stay at home to raise their kids. She had more to accomplish, more dreams to live out.

However, she kept her mouth shut throughout the trip and laid awake at night beside him after they made love several times, trying to come up with a gentle way to stay no.

She glanced across at him. He still had his boyish looks from college. The constantly mussed hair, the knee buckling smile, and those soft brown eyes that were so expressive when his face was not. The sex always felt passionate and raw. Their banter was as witty as it was in college. He could keep up and dish out an equivalent amount of pop culture references as her and Lorelai.

On the last night on the island at dinner, after desert, he told he needed to say something. He reached into his breast pocket and pulled out the ring box and then reached for her hand.

"Rory", he began as he looked into her eyes. It had taken him a month after they had gotten back together to call her ace again. "The past two years have been great. I've had so much fun."

"Listen Logan –" She interrupted as she tried to desperately stop his next words, but he plowed on.

"I turned thirty this year and my family has been pressuring me to settle down for a while now" He sighed "and I've been thinking a lot and I've realized I want that. A family. The companionship of a woman and kids to come home to and love forever."

"Logan, you know that can't happen if we were both to continue with the schedules our hectic careers have" Rory tried to reason. "I want it too but I can't. Not right now"

"But I do" Logan pressed. "God damn it. I would never try to stop you from following your dreams. They're important to you and they're what I love most about you. But I want to build my own family and do it right, like Honor did with Josh". She remembered the joy on his face when he interacted with Honor's kids. They had stayed with them for a whole week when Josh and Honor took a vacation to Rome to celebrate their 5-year anniversary. He was so good with them and they had so much fun that week.

There was a collective silence as they both reminisced about that week. Then he decided it was time to say it.

"I suggested the no strings agreement because my parents" He said hesitantly as if trying to find the words "arranged a match with this heiress of a dutch shipping company several years ago but decided to wait until we were both ready to announce it. I'm ready and next week, it's going to be official. Although I'm not in love with Serena, I'm happy with her. We've been friends since her brief stint at a boarding school in Connecticut" He finished gruffly.

Rory felt as if she was having an out of body experience. She never expected those words. They were like sharp slap to the face. He did was not professing his love for her as she had imagined. They were talking about his upcoming nuptials. To another woman.

He continued, "I'm not going to pressure you again into something you are clearly not ready for" as he took her shocked state as relief. "I always hoped it was you in the end but I know we are not at the same place in life and I've accepted it"

"So are you asked me to your mistress?" Rory croaked as she felt her anger bubbling up to the surface as the humor in her voice fell flat. The thought of never having their blonde haired blued eyed babies that she never knew she had not ever given a thought to, invoked a crushing heaviness on her soul.

"No Rory. I'm trying to warn you that I'm going to end this thing we have when I get married," He said tightly. "Serena and I decided that we could fool around until the wedding ceremony. However, we are going to be faithful to each other throughout our marriage and raise our kids with more love then we were brought up with"

Numbly, she struggled to come up with a response. She had always thought he would wait for her to be ready. Wasn't that what love was? Wasn't that the depth of devotion one should feel when they love their partner? To stick by the person you could not live without and wait"

She had thought he was going to beg her to commitment and profess that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. The gentle turndown she had planned was to reason with him that he could wait a few more years if he truly wanted to be with her. She hadn't expected him to end it. Logan Huntzberger was supposed to wait for her to be ready to start life as next Mrs. Huntzberger. She had just realized her dreams of the mischievous little boy with her hair and his eyes, a darling blonde haired girl that was daddy's little girl.

On the campaign trail, she had always hoped she would find her way back to Logan and live her happily ever after. She convinced herself that it would work out in the end during the past 2-years they had spent in undefined relationship.

Struggling to keep the tears at bay, she said thickly "How much time do we have left together?"

"3 months"

* * *

 **Author Note: I don't know if I want to leave it as a one shot or not. I do love me some angst! I was thinking to continue it as a multi chapter fanfic and have Rory realized she wants him and fight for Logan. Let me know what you think!**


End file.
